Posts tagged with: office meetings

How to suck up to your boss

This is a good time to impress your boss. I know a lot of you don’t enjoy sucking up to the folks in charge. But if you’re not going to do it when unemployment levels are soaring, when are you going to do it?

Here, then, are some sucking-up tips I’ve observed from my once-a-week forays into the offices of the publishing company for which I work.

1. If you’re going to play one of those free games that come with your computer while on company time, go with solitaire. It looks more “heady” than getting caught playing mine sweeper.

2. I know it’s sometimes hard to continually pay attention when your boss is throwing at you his 15th idea this week for surviving the recession. But don’t fall asleep. And if you do, try not to fall out of your chair.

3. My company has a section in their employee handbook that forbids workers from eating in the company bathrooms. I know it’s tempting, but don’t eat that hoagie in the fourth-floor restroom.

4. Bosses like friendly employees. When you’re cussing out a co-worker, make sure to smile.

5. Finally, if you thought the doughnut you were grabbing at the breakfast meeting was filled with custard, try not to spit it back in the box when you discover it’s lemon-filled instead.